Blessed are the peacemakers, Jesus said. I remember that far too well, trying to ease conflicts, smoothing over disagreements, making amendments, giving way.
Peace is not equal to absence of sound. Conflicts not heard as words will still be felt as sorrow, rage, and pain. Not peace at all.
I talked this over with a psychiatrist friend this summer. Sometimes peace can only be made by getting out, not by giving in, she said. Even to us “good girls” who wants to be liked by everybody, who wants to make peace, there are situations and relations where quitting is the only solution.
Perhaps the peacemaking needs to be balanced by some other commands?
One could be :If they do not accept you, shake the dust off your feet and move on, as Jesus also told his disciples.
The most important: Love yourself as you love your neighbor, sometimes means, shake it off and move on.
Perhaps advent could be a time for shaking our furs and letting go? To fight and to make peace, but only where we do it from the heart of our souls, and where there is a will to work together for peace. Never to make peace by quenching what we believe in, by silencing the voice of our hearts.
As usual, I will be blogging on our advent blog, julefryd (Christmas Joy) until Christmas. This is the fifth year my brother Trygve and me share our advent thoughts together. We’ll see you there! I’ll be back on Indexyourlife after Christmas.
Happy advent and Christmas to all!
Indexyourlife 
Hi there wonderful friend! I have been reading your “Index” posts and enjoying the Advent blog that you and your brother write (I use Google Translate for that so it often is pretty amusing with the translation…but I can always get the main message! I have been working hard at shaking it off and letting it go. The peacemaking tested my limits at Thanksgiving when my sister-in-law (who supports Donald Trump) said some things that shook me to my soul. Smoothing over the disagreements with her has been a piece of cake with the difficulty I have personally had, crawling out of my deep pit of resentment.
But then I spend time with my sweet mentees, or look at a new picture of my perfect grandson, or hear my best of all husbands tell me he loves me, and my feathers get smoothed and my heart get softened and I know that I get great joy in my life with the family that I have chosen!
We are done with the shopping, all gifts that must be mailed have been sent. I am lazily wrapping the rest, a few at a time. Tomorrow we will bring out the boxes of Christmas treasures and decorate the house, except for the Christmas Tree, which we will get on Little Christmas Eve. We always go to the same tree farm up near Truckee and Apple Hill each year.
Today I spent about an hour looking at pictures of Berlin and Norway from last December and remembering what a joy it was to be there basking in your friendship! I am loving you and missing you and your wonderful husband!