Category Archives: blogging

December 2nd – the merry newspaperboy

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IMG_1714 peisgirlanderIt was still dark outside as I opened the door to hang out the Christmas wreath on our front door. The day before there was no Christmas anywhere in our house. Now the tree was glittering, every surface was decorated, the stockings were full, the windows had Christmas curtains. The tables had Christmas tablecloths, and yes, the teddy bears and dolls had Christmas ribbons on.

I put the wreath in place and stepped back to admire my work. Then a happy voice called out: ” Merry Christmas!” it was the newspaperboy trudging through the snow at six o’clock in the morning. Then he added: “Why are you up so early? Isn’t it a holiday?” I am sure I smiled, I am sure I said the right thing, I did not tell him the truth though. I had not been in bed at all. When the kids finally where in bed the night before I had started a whirlwind of activity that had taken me through the whole night.

Now I was ready to stagger with bloodshot eyes into Christmas, ready to fight to keep my eyes open, longing to be in bed, while everybody else was getting ready. Later that day we sat next to my good friend and her family at Christmas Eve service. We both fell asleep. I did not keep my secret from her, “when did you go to bed?”I said. It was when she answered “not yet” we both knew that we had to keep this secret, as no-one would agree that any Christmas decorations was worth it.

I think that was the start of our decline. From the mountain of self-declared queens of Christmas  into the calm vallies and peaceful meadows of being Christmas friends.

The first step was leaving the tradition of magical transformation behind. From then on I allowed Christmas to tiptoe silently and graciously into my home from the first of December. Every day I do one thing that could evolve into the Christmas I want. Make a wreath, buy some gifts, prepare some food. Then, at the 24th of December, Christmas is here and I embrace it as it is. Now a days I might even be enjoy greeting the newspaperboy, as it will never be at the ending of the night, but at the crisp, magical beginning of Christmas, with me, rested and happy in the middle of it all.

Just now though, I will light the fire, curl up on the couch and listen to Christmas music. In my heart there will be Christmas already!

Believe me, I know better than most how frantic and exhausting it is possible to make the season of peace and goodwill. The main story on Indexyourlife in December will be my way to a Christmas free of tangles.

In December my brother and I write an advent calendar blog together in norwegian.You may visit at  JULEFRYD or Christmas Joy. This year we will be writing or sharing thoughts and joys of gifts, giving and sharing. We will post there every day, and I will share some of that blog here on indexyourlife too.

All pictures at Indexyourlife are mine, if not otherwise stated.

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Simplest of the simple, and yet….

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IMG_0923Life is a messy business. I really do not know why I keep adding to the mess. Open my cupboards and you will wonder, why does she not keep it tidy? As just now, why is the cheese slicer in the same drawer as the matches? Are they ever used together? Well, sometimes…

Is it more time-consuming to put the named cheese slicer with the cutlery. Well it could be, but I am not that busy am I?

The thing is, I need space and order to think, but I do not naturally create space and order. Another of my great-grandmother’s sayings is “everything that is not stolen or burnt up will return,” could be true,  I just am to impatient to wait for that.

Accordingly this is how I keep just enough organized.

1. I bundle.
For instance :When I empty one garbage can, say in the kitchen, I try to go through the house and do the others as well.
If I buy one gift, I think of others that would like the same and buy more.

2. I use the time I have.
For instance: I clear out my purse, when I change into another. I clear out the named cutlery drawer and not my whole kitchen, while emptying the dish washer. I delete messages when waiting in line.

3. I sort when I need it.
For instance: filing all email concerning one case when I am dealing with that.

4. I always de clutter when looking for something

5. I clear out one space every day, which means I pretty much go through my house once a year.

6. Most of all and through it all, I prioritize. Not according to what others think is important, but according to the bigger goals of my life. Does searching for a cheese slicer make me a bad person? Of course it does not. Using time to search for the slicer, when I could have called someone, written a note, or just being quiet is, if not bad, it sure is wasteful.

Order is never about systems, it is always about what would you rather do than search. On the other hand, if looking for things keeps the treasure hunter alive in you, go ahead. Keep messy, you could even have a go at my drawers.

In November I take part in the NaBloPoMo,  in the BlogHer network. I post every day on “The Untangling Tens” what women do when life gets tangled. These are the ten tools that worked for those I have asked, what are yours?

The pictures in this blog are always by me, Solveig Mjolsnes. This one is of my 150 years old sewing table, which I probably think will help me keep my threads in order.

Myself in the work of others

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Reflected in the work of Chihuly

Reflected in the work of Chihuly, Seattle

I do not remember where, really, I am not that organized. Anyways, some weeks ago, at some official WordPress site, someone told about conferences for bloggers. Really? What? Like spending time with lots of people who thought blogging was serious? The thought had never occurred to me, of course I had to check out some links.To go all way I even registered at the BlogHerPro conference in Silicon valley. These bloggers were not only blogging, they were doing it for a living.

Truth to be told, I did not know what  to expect, indeed I did not even know if it was for real. “Are you sure it is not a scam?” My nearest and dearest absolutely nonblogging husband was not so sure either. At least the hotel was for real, I told myself, so my last resort was to stay in my room and blog.

IMG_0842 dale chihulyOf course I did not get to blog. I did not even have time for taking pictures. The only one was the Dale Chihuly chandelier in the lobby while checking out. A fitting illustration for an inspiring, thought-provoking and amazing experience. I got legal and marketing advice, technical support and got to talk to people who have achieved great results in short time.

To me, it was all about life, how we grow when we share. Blogging just happened to be the chosen medium.

I am glad, people who are generous and willing to give, share and enjoy will always be what makes us better and braver. My only challenge is to believe that each of us is needed, each of us have a unique voice. Some of those amazing people have a big social network, their voices are heard, their blogs are read. I need not to be intimidated by their success, even if I sometimes am. Quite the opposite, I keep learning that when I read another true voice I get better at listening to my own heart, I’ll just have to keep finding the words of that often timid voice. I am still amazed where that voice will take me.

Magic adventure with Chihuly boats, Seattle

Magic adventure with Chihuly boats, Seattle

My dream home

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Building a nest.

Building a nest.

It was a rainy, cold sunday afternoon, one of many in a rainy, cold summer. We would have loved to curl up with a book and a cup of coffee. Our children were running wild though, back and forth in the living room, having so much pent-up energy. We just looked at them and each other, and went for our rain gear. Come on, we are going for a walk, in the woods! They were jumping and running in front of us for a little while, then they stopped and walked very silently close to us. What’s the matter with you guys? You may jump and shout as much as you like here, why are you so timid? The youngest looked up at us, with eyes that said “you do not really understand much, do you?” then he explained it all to us. “You know, when I am at home the world is this big and I can run everywhere” he said and stretched his small arms in front of him. ” But when I am outside” he continued, and crossed his arms in front of him and made himself even smaller ” when I am outside the world stops just here”, he said and wiggled his little finger in the crook of his arms. His words ring in my heart whenever I get too ambitious in any homemaking projects. Building a dream home means nothing if it does not make its inhabitants able to call the world their home. Building my dream home is done by nourishing and supporting everything in myself, my husband, our children and our guests that make us feel happy, content, safe and also daring, confident and able to be at home wherever and with whoever.

I love flights of fancy, I do dream of beautiful homes and wonderful settings. I do spend lots of time making our houses lovely and welcoming. But most of all I dream of a world where all of us, no matter who we are or where we live, may safely and happily go out into the world, jump and shout for joy, and know, I am at home. I think I already won that lottery, I am building my dream home, every day.

Listless is clueless

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Mad Hatter Teaparty

Mad Hatter Teaparty

I was having some girl friends over, and some of us had quite a lot on our plates just then. You know that middle age means being in the middle of all ages did you not? There were parents, spouses, kids, grandchildren, obligations and careers, and we were in the middle of it all, comforting, helping, advising and supporting. We got to talking about how we tackled stress, and how we sorted our priorities. No one surprised the others by saying she made a list, because we all do that.

Too much to consider

Too much to consider

The interesting part is how we make different lists and how we make lists differently. One of my friends said the trick was to make a narrow list, just wide enough for a single item, that would convince her that one step at a time would guide her through her day, and it would. My mother used to go to the other extreme, the bigger sheet of paper the better. She would make columns for each hour of the day, allot tasks to each hour, and then force ahead, being sure that if nothing happened it would be possible to achieve it all.

Too much on you plate...

Too much on you plate…

Then of course, as most of the elements on her lists were living creatures who did not know that we were committed to paper, she was always behind her schedule. She found it comforting to know though that life was the messy part, not her planning. To me all sorts of lists are basic survival tools. My head is always filled to the brim with ideas, plans, projects, dreams and pictures. I can handle that, what makes me reach for my notepad is when worries are trying to take over.

Just one task at the time

Just one task at the time

If I think I really have too much to do, I use a list to tell me it is not true.To me list making is a way of making sure that the pieces of my life’s puzzle will fit together and make a beautiful picture in the end. I jot down every thought that comes to mind, not categorizing or sorting, just everything. Like emptying the puzzle box on a big table. The rationale is that if it is crowding my head it needs to get out so I can see what it is all about. Normally it takes only a couple of minutes to know that whats left in my head might stay where it is.

They do not really care about the fuzz

They do not really care about the fuzz

Then I start sorting. Normally the categories would be family and friends, work and church. These are the corners holding my picture together. Then of course there will be different projects to do and to remember. The surprise that always elevates me is that is normally boils down to the small details of the big picture. Thinking it over, having a look at the pieces that want to be in my picture I can confer with the picture on the box of the puzzle and say, sorry you do not belong, or I can turn it over and say, this piece goes with the border, so let’s just keep it out of the middle for a while.

Let's get to work

Let’s get to work

Doing this I also discover that life is just like the old jigsaw puzzles at our cabin. Someone has been lazy when sorting the pieces. Mostly you will discover that by emptying the box. As in life, I can easily  spot and remove the big, clumsy pieces that clearly not belong.

One big picture

One big picture

It get’s tricky though, sometimes you can make a piece from another box fit. Not quite, but almost. That is when I get stressed, that is when I sense something is wrong, when I try to fit something into my life because somebody has dumped it into my box. As I get older, I am learning. Doing what others should do is not taking responsibility, it is robbing someone else of the blessings to being allowed to  walk in the work prepared for them.

Different tasks

Different tasks

Of course, when nobody is shouldering the task, when there is a real emergency, that is something else. If not, I have learned it is wise to just wait it out, sorting through my pieces once more. Resting in the blessing that I will have time for what I am called to do, quietly putting the other pieces back where they belong.

First things first, as pigs see it

First things first, as pigs see it

The pictures are from the County Fair this weekend. Busy, teeming with life, everybody concentrating on their own tasks.

Teamwork

Teamwork

It is not my story – writing challenge on what I never would tell

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IMG_0196 heart of heartsWhen I saw the picture of those two chefs in this weeks writing challenge I knew at once what the story was. It would not be fiction though, as it is one of my treasured memories. An impromptu wedding in an alpine flower field. A poetic wedding service with towering, snow-clad swiss alps as backdrop. A glowing bride walking up to the improvised altar while the wind played with her veil and someone played a joyful tune on a wooden flute. Leading up to this was only two days of preparing, an unprecedented whirl of activity. There was not much money, but everyone had searched their hearts and mind to find what they could contribute. Those two chefs, who never had worked together before, were able to  create a colorful and well tasting feast from meagre ingredients. One girl knew how to give a massage and went through the preparing crowds easing the strain, some of us picked wild flowers, some were scrubbing floors or doing laundry to prepare for guests. The strongest carried tables and chairs from all the village to the biggest lawn.

Setting of another marvellous wedding

Setting of another marvellous wedding

Then, this is what I saw, and what I took part in, which would only be romantic, not fabulous if it were not for the rest of the story. Why this haste? Who were married? When was this? Did they live happily forever after? I know only part of those answers, I have no way to check up on what I do not know, and I know that if I write more, someone could recognize this setting and be hurt if I did not tell the story right. I know what version I have of the truth, and that is enough to know that the rest is not my story to tell. To me that goes with all blogging and writing, knowing what to tell and what to keep. If I was listening to someone sharing their troubles or joys in confidence, I would not open the windows and shout into the streets, listen to this great story! Even when I took part in the story, only my part is the one to share. You would have loved to be in that wedding though, and then we could have shared our memories of the probably most glorious romantic story we ever witnessed. As it is, it’s up to you to imagine!

Why do the birds sing? Or a postaday answer to Why do you blog?

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Blogging is reflection

Blogging is reflection

Carl Barks has this legendary story about why birds sing. His character Gyro Gearloose starts an experiment with a bird and three theories:

May be it is sad, maybe it is happy, maybe it just sings?

IMG_1120 sandpiper

What would the sandpiper tell us?

After having trapped the bird, in the ordinary way ( you did know how to do that did you not? By sprinkling salt on its tail of course!) he questions it by wiring it’s head. The answer is : May be I am sad, may be I am happy, may be I just sing.

Perhaps I am sad

Perhaps I am sad

Just like with blogging. The thing is the communication, to share into the world regardless of who is listening. Which to me is what being a human being is all about, to communicate, to share and to learn from another. Whether I am sad, whether I am happy, whether I just want to sing.

Perhaps I am happy

Perhaps I am happy

The beauty of it, both in talking and writing, is that by arranging my words and sorting through my mind, I get closer to understand  why I am singing just now. The best part of it is to grow wiser both by knowing myself and by listening to the thoughts of others. Blogging is like a big campfire, where there always is a new story to listen to, new wisdom to take part in and a new song to join.

IMG_0352 sharing joy

And then again, sometimes I just want to sing.

Press it! Sharing blogs that make a difference

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Other people may show me when I am too narrow-minded

Other people may show me when I am too narrow-minded

Prompted by the postaday prompt to share and recommend three blogs that I loved, I am happy to recommend these three persons who all makes a difference in the world through what they do and what they blog.

Some years ago I asked my brother, who knows this kind of things, is it possible to earn money on my pictures? I was aching for some new gear, a photo safari in Lofoten….you name it, I needed cash! But most of all I ached for a job closer to my heart.  He gave me a book by David du Chemin, Visionmongers. It was not so much about photography as it was about finding, sharing and living by one’s true calling and abilities, the vision and passion. David writes so well, is an astonishing photographer and comes through as a genuine caring person. That book meant a lot to me, and of course I was happy to discover his blog. One of the guiding stars in my life is “give, and it shall be given unto you” . This is the spirit of David’s work too. He writes so poignantly about that today. “Let them steal”,he says, talking about how the fear of being the victim of theft kills the creative energy we could have used for creating. Have a look at his work and words your self!

David du Chemin-world and Humanitarian Photographer

Other people may show me new steps to take

Other people may show me new steps to take

Then there is an norwegian blog I’d love to share, the MD Maria Gjerpe, writes so well, combining medical knowledge with her own experience about chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS).  I do not have that illness myself, but have family members who suffer. Maria’s first hand , balanced and sound advice is just what I need. Just now she has started a project to  crowd fund research on CFS. If you do understand norwegian, have a look!

Maria Gjerpe

Listening to others may even give me a new perspective

Listening to others may even give me a new perspective

Last night I got a like on my own blog from someone I had not seen before. I checked out her blog and followed immediately. Pat is a Dominican Sister of San Rafael. She shares so many of my hobbies, hiking, walking and photography. Then again she has chosen a different way of living her belief than I have done, which makes it a gift to me to be able to listen in on her perspective. Her poems and pictures are like a spring of fresh water on a walking trip. You might like it too.

Her post today is about optimism, go visit OPreach!

Index or indexy? A postaday prompt to publish a draft

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Yesterday's card

Yesterday’s card

Some of my old midwestern friends told me their organizing secret, always carry index-cards in your wallet.

As if…I thought. When I finally got around to use the calendar and address book on my phone, why should I return to paper? Then I met someone who invited me over for coffee, and before I could make a note on my gadget she pulled out a card, drove a map, made some helpful notes ( ..and I know my GPS would not have told me to watch for the cute mailbox) and gave it to me. Hmm, neat. When I had been there I did not need the note anymore and could discard it (literally). I also know that I never go into my digitalized notes and organize or delete them.

Plowers and pipers, totally unorganized and happy about it.

Plowers and pipers, totally unorganized and happy about it.

Then I needed some material for a new project, snippets of what I got  stapled on an index-card, add the new bought stuff ,and I had the start of a project archive.

Then I needed a list of directions for a bicycle ride, write on card, tear out and tape on to my handlebar.

Then I was waiting for my husband for lunch and come to think of one of the things I do not do and that  I probably should do….write a diary. Nothing  serious. Just as a memory trigger for pictures I take and thoughts I am not through with thinking. I do not want to carry more in my bag, I do not want a prestigious project, and I do love the concept of all-in-one.Index cards, and the idea and theme of this blog was born together with my “Indexyourlife- diary”.

Where I sat yesterday

Where I sat yesterday

Once a day, when waiting for something, I pull out my spiral bound index cards. I write the date and a heading. Yesterday it was ” At Coal Point” then I write what I am doing just then, a thought that is passing through my mind or just some facts. NEVER more than one small card. The beauty is that I can do all other indexy stuff on the following pages, and not ruin my diary, as I will pull them out and sort them when the stack is up.

The waves were great, no whales at whale point though

The waves were great, no whales at whale point though

The true beauty is that this is just at the core of what I think organizing should be about. Not de-cluttering and buying organizing tools, but taking care to use my resources on my true values, and not let my own or other people’s clutter de-energize me or make me waste my precious time. Indexyour life is my way of taking stock, stopping in the middle of my day, saying: I am here, this is what I do, this is what I think. Doing this I turn what could be irritating ( waiting for someone) into a precious moment of reflection.

The thing I never do is putting information on them and index it…..that is one thing machines can do better than me. I am indexy-ish not a robot!

Not me! Interesting at the computer museum at Bletchley Park

Not me! Interesting at the computer museum at Bletchley Park

I’ll run into the water! On sharing the love

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Britt Arnhild's green house, we share the love of gardening

Britt Arnhild’s green house, we share the love of gardening

Summer camp, we were 14, we were sharing thoughts, beliefs, singing, joy, addresses and then we went home. Some days later I got a letter in the post from Britt Arnhild. I think we would make friends, she said, tell me about your life!

Our friendship grew through the years, through shared secrets, joys, sorrows, travels and belief. We are now both mothers of four and live in the same city, most of the time.

We share the joy of quilting, reading and coffee

We share the joy of quilting, reading and coffee

Then we moved to the US. Tell me about your life, she said. Why don’t you start a blog! She had been blogging for years and have made friends all over the world, her posts are truly inspiring and accompanied by her own great photos. Wonderful! I just did not feel up to it, and kept sending travel letters by e-mail.

We came back, I kept reading her blog, she kept laughing and saying, why do you not start a blog! And then I did. I have been blogging for some years. I have had so much fun making advent calendar blogs together with my siblings. I have had private blogs with my children. I have used my blogs as training grounds for speeches and presentations, and I have a new way of sharing the pictures I take.

Reading in the green house

Reading in the green house

Almost, ok then, totally addictive!

Then we moved to the states again, and Britt Arnhild says, hey why don’t you get to know and love my blogging friends over there! Yes, why not indeed?

And here I am, planning adventures with, and getting to know her friends.

Shared faith

Shared faith

I just heard the lyrics of that old country song,” I’ll be waiting on the far side banks of Jordan” and knew that on the other side of Blogging Jordan, Britt Arnhild will be waiting, running through the shallow waters reaching for my hand, to encourage, to share, and keep me blogging.

Why don’t you visit? http://www.brittarnhildshouseinthewoods.typepad.com

Her latest project is a monday series of portraits of the friends she has made through blogging. She won’t be running out of subjects any time soon.