I have listed ” light a candle” as a tool that women use to untangle their tangles. I said to light a candle is a way of focusing a way of praying. So accordingly I said to get where you need to be, you should start by lighting a candle for your soul. then I said you should light a candle for “us” for the fellowship you belong to, for the ground where your roots will grow. Lastly I say we should light a candle for the world.

Hey, did I get that right? Isn’t that selfishness itself, the me and the us first and the world last? A wise lady I knew, Edith Schaeffer, said : “if you want to feed the world, you do not open your window and trow flour and yeast over the waiting multitudes. You have to bake the bread first.” Or at least, I would add, take time to learn how to do it. Then of course the most profound knowledge is to allow yourself to taste the bread that others are serving you, fellowship is not
Or as Jesus said, love your neighbor as yourself, never “you are not worthy of love, only your neighbors are.” Accordingly, knowing who I am and where I belong is my starting point for loving and serving the world.
OK, even if that is true, you say, I was looking for tools to untangle my troubles, not taking on another task.
Start by lighting your third candle I would say.
Light it and allow your thoughts to convene to a cause outside yourself. It is not a tool to make you think your own problems are not worth solving, it is a tool to make your remember why you are here. When you have refocused on that,some of the threads of your tangle will seem irrelevant,. Start the other way, by thinking of everything that is wrong I the world and chances are you will be overwhelmed and burnt out. Start by knowing that you are loved and belong somewhere and your service will give you strength and joy. Then again, don’t think too much, just light your candle. Or as Mother Theresa said: “just show up and something will happen.”

In November I take part in the NaBloPoMo,  in the BlogHer network. I post every day on “The Untangling Tens” what women do when life gets tangled. These are the ten tools that worked for those I have asked, what are yours?

All pictures in this blog are taken by me, Solveig Mjolsnes.