We are still figuring out what untangling tools we think help us best when life is tangled. Even if I list the ten best steps, I do not think they have to be steps on the same ladder. At times, life looks different after a night’s sleep. Then sleep wa the tool you needed. There even are times when everything turns out for the best if we just are able to wait a little bit and not making the mess worse by pulling all the strings we see. Then nothing was the tool you needed.
Even if there was a ten step plan I do not think it would be the same for everyone. I do think most of us should have “call a friend” on our list, I also think we could evaluate when we do that. I respect my close friends too much to use them as scetching boards. I respect my own experience and the responsibility I have over my own life too much to not use it. Even so , calling a friend is not so much about solutions as it is about confirming the “we and us”. Most of us have friends that look at us as humans, while we ourselves tend to think we should be superhumans. Isn’t that often the case when life gets too much? We just are dissapointed in our selves for not being able to handle it all? For not having foresight to understand what would happen, for not being able to keep everybody happy? A friend will tell me both that I am OK and that I should put my act together as I have handled worse before. Most of all a friend stays with you, no matter what.
Alas, friends like that are hard to come by. To find a kindred spirit is a gift that we do not receive in every setting we are in.
That is the time for writing your best friend a letter, and then read it. You will be surprised how wise you are! Then it could be the time for writing a blog. Actually being your own best friend is not a second best, it is the only way of knowing how to be a friend to others.
In November I take part in the NaBloPoMo, in the BlogHer network. I post every day on “The Untangling Tens” what women do when life gets tangled. These are the ten tools that worked for those I have asked, what are yours?
All pictures in this blog are taken by me, Solveig Mjolsnes. This one has is taken at my dear friend Britt Arnhilds house, I”ll tell the story later! Have a look at her blog!